i don’t know what’s the deal with this guy. i don’t know how i should be with him. i can’t decide if i want it just for fun or in it for the long haul. i. just. don’t. know. maybe when i have the courage to finally decide that’s the time i’m going to talk to him. right now i just want something fun, but at the back of my mind i want something more than just fun. i want something real. i guess i have to give myself a little bit more self worth than this. i can’t do this thing we have right now. it’s just weird. i mean, it’s fun when we’re together but then there’s the stress of thinking about it when we’re not together. or i could just probably inch away form the radar and sort of detox myself of him. i did it with my ex before there’s no reason why i won’t be able to do it with him. ok. i just realized i want something more. this is bad. i’m going to have to stop texting him. i told him i missed him right before i left. he didn’t say anything back. :( this is just crazy. no way am i investing myself on some guy that won’t invest back. i’ve been there with my ex and i can’t handle being in that kind of situation before. although i can’t really get mad at this new guy because he’s really so nice to me whenever we’re together. crap. i hate it. he’s playing mind games with me. well, i’m going to do the same.

i really like the new guy. he’s nice and my friends really like him a lot. all of my friends that met him all approve him with just one look. hehe. well he looks so far from my ex. for one thing, he’s taller. and nicer. i just don’t know what to make of him. does he like me? i hope he does. let’s all take this nice and slow. i’m just enjoying my youth and having a good time. i don’t mind the extra attention that i seem to be getting from guys once they knew that i was single and available. oh yeah.

Calm down 
Deep breaths 
And get yourself dressed instead 
Of running around 
And pulling all your threads and 
Breaking yourself up 

If it’s a broken part, replace it 
If it’s a broken arm then brace it 
If it’s a broken heart then face it 

And hold your own 
Know your name 
And go your own way 
Hold your own 
Know your name 
And go your own way 

And everything will be fine 

Hang on 
Help is on the way 
Stay strong 
I’m doing everything 

Hold your own 
Know your name 
And go your own way 
Hold your own 
Know your name 
And go your own way 

And everything 
Everything will be fine 
Everything 

Are the details in the fabric 
Are the things that make you panic 
Are your thoughts results of static cling? 

Are the things that make you blow 
Hell, no reason, go on and scream 
If you’re shocked it’s just the fault 
Of faulty manufacturing.

Everything will be fine 
Everything in no time at all 
Everything 

Hold your own 
And know your name 
Go your own way 

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own)
Are the things that make you panic (Know your name)
Are your thoughts results of static cling? (Go your own way)

Hold your own 
Know your name 
Go your own way. 

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own)
Are the things that make you panic (Know your name)
Is it Mother Nature’s sewing machine? (Go your own way) 
Are the things that make you blow (Hold your own)
Hell no reason go on and scream (Know your name)
If you’re shocked it’s just the fault (Go your own way)
Of faulty manufacturing 

Everything will be fine 
Everything in no time at all
Hearts will hold 

i can’t do this. i have to stop chasing him. guys are chasing me now. don’t give up on yourself! i am way better than this. i told him it has got to stop. i can’t go on like this. 

i have moved on. i am way better than this. i am out of his league. i will not stoop down to his level again. 

amen

there are so many things life has to offer. i am not going to stand by and let it pass me by. i will grab every opportunity. no time to waste!

i will get over you.

i am over you.